25 Oct
Advertisers have made us fear wrinkles and aging. We flush millions of dollars down the toilet every year for empty promises and damaging hits to our self-esteem

Advertisers made us fear wrinkles and aging. We flush millions of dollars down the toilet every year for empty promises and damaging hits to our self-esteem

The oddest conversations happen sometimes when you are in a waiting area with a chatterbox across from you.

I was waiting for Danny, my massage therapist, and reading my book the other day when another woman is led into the waiting area and sits on the other side of the small area. I am usually Danny’s first client of the day so I am used to him running a little later than the time they tell me to arrive. I am also used to being the only one in the spa at that time of day because most people are there after work or on weekends. Chatterbox’s aesthetician set me up in a changing room at the same time as the other woman so I did not have to wait longer.

Danny had my warm foot soak ready for me when I returned to the waiting area and ran off to make sure the room was ready.

I overheard Chatterbox and the aesthetician talking about skin care and products. Then the aesthetician left.

Left me alone with Chatterbox.

Damn it.

She started talking as soon as we were alone and there was no longer a book between us getting in the way of me giving her the attention she was craving. She needed to talk to me about skin care and facials because she is obsessed with skin care. Or at least seemed to be with the way she went on about it.

Chatterbox thinks that skin care is so new to us and she wished we had more emphasis on it when she was younger. I put her in her fifties, maybe early sixties. She did not say it outright, but she was not happy with her wrinkles. She said I am lucky because I have darker skin. She thinks the “older cultures, like “Asians” have better emphasis on skin care.

I let her jabber on but I just wanted to drop my head in my hands. I was thinking while she yammered on –  Boy, corporate America has their hooks in you making you believe you need all these products to fight those wrinkles. HURRY UP, DANNY!  If you only knew how old I really am and what I do for my skin care.

Instead, I just smiled and nodded. It was not the time or place to point out her stereotyping or her misinformation.

Then her aesthetician saved me. I could have kissed her.

I have not had a professional facial in a very long time. At least twelve years. The aesthetician who did my last one told me I need to have my eyebrows shaped and several other things that made me leave feeling NOT good about myself and angry at her for doing that. Screw that!

And here’s my skin care secret. Warm, wet washcloth to wash my face daily, homemade astringent (right now it’s rosewater with lavender and juniper berry essential oils), and homemade lotion. The same lotion I use for my hands and the rest of my body. Sometimes, I make my own sugar scrub or an aspirin mask to do a deep exfoliation. That’s it. No peels, expensive gadgets, fancy wrinkle-busting lotions, or age-defying creams. I like my money in the bank and not down the drain.

A friend asked on Facebook a couple of weeks ago what everyone uses to fight wrinkles. I told her I stopped trying to fight them. I like my wrinkles. They tell a story. My story.


Posted by on October 25, 2013 in Uncategorized


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4 responses to “Chatterbox

  1. missdarque

    October 25, 2013 at 6:51 pm

    When I was about 18 my sister told me that I was getting wrinkles around my mouth, and that I needed to start doing something about them. I told her that they existed because I was happy.

    My grandmother has been a beauty product queen nearly all of her life. She started trying to encourage me to use moisturizers from the time I hit puberty.

    My mom, sister and I would have fun sometimes playing with the peel off face masks or the apricot scrubs in the 90s, but it wasn’t a serious thing for me. It was just time to connect with the women in my family. Now my mom is an oil cleansing method kind of woman.

    I’ve only recently started to use a coconut water, coconut oil based night time moisturizer. I admit it is in part because of the deep wrinkles in my forehead which show through my mineral makeup. But, it also feels like a little “me” time at the end of the day. There’s definitely a difference between being obsessed with outward appearance, and taking care of your body. I wonder if the Chatterbox was the type to never leave the house without makeup.

    • hunterslyonesse

      October 26, 2013 at 3:03 am

      You know what’s funny is the water is so soft back home that I never used lotion or anything on my face. I barely used any on my body. The water is really hard out here and it dries me out. I did use coconut oil for a long time as my body and facial moisturizer. Then I had that reaction to it several months ago and I haven’t used it since.

      If she is the type she left without it that day because she wasn’t wearing any, which makes sense if you’re getting a facial. She was going on and on about sunscreen and telling me I need to use it. I nearly told her I was from Hawai`i and used it ALL THE TIME. But then I feared more stereotyping from her so I kept quiet.

  2. Shirley @ gfe & AGFD

    October 27, 2013 at 12:44 am

    Boy, you have amazing strength NOT to respond in some way to that woman’s beauty obsession. While I don’t have perfect skin, I am pretty happy with not being caught up the makeup and beauty drama. I’ve always felt that if I didn’t use all of those products then I wouldn’t be shocked one day when I no longer wanted to fool with or couldn’t fool with makeup. I feel like I’ve always been me, not someone hidden under a bunch of make-up, caught in a bunch of skin care routines, upset by my wrinkles, etc. Your last line says it best about wrinkles. We all know that fighting things never works per the law of attraction anyway. 😉

    • hunterslyonesse

      October 27, 2013 at 1:52 pm

      I needed to relieve stress not cause more of it while waiting. 😀 It wasn’t until a few years ago that I started wearing makeup regularly. Because of all my reactions I stopped wearing it except for special occasions earlier this year and sometimes just lipstick for a little extra color. I was putting a little on Thursday night before we went out for my birthday and I swear I was looking at everything thinking, how do I put it on again? lol


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