Working in the mental health field for twelve and a half years, over ten of them with young kids and teens, taught me to accept change quickly and to roll with it when a wrench is thrown into my plans for the day. Dealing with multiple crises and ever-changing Medicaid emergency regulations that never become permanent will do that. You learn to work within the chaos or it chews you up and spits you out without mercy.
I became so used to change that I started to relish it. New position to challenge me instead of having the comfort of the familiar day after day? Yes, please! Quit the job I love for the unknown? Okay! Work with adults and educate them? Sure! What? Take over for my boss when she retires? Sign me up! Wait, move to another state because Chaz’s boss is going to expand the business? Give me the boxes to pack! Work in retail for a big box store? I can do it!
It shouldn’t bother me. I should be able to go about my day and not care that there is a lot of open land where there was once a ton of trees.
But it does.
One of the things I loved when we moved in was that wooded area because I knew I could sit out on the patio without worrying about someone watching me. Unless kids were playing out back, but they’re always too busy playing to pay any attention to me. The trees are usually budding by now, but because of the crazy weather, nothing is ready to bloom. I’m anxious to see how much privacy we have with the trees in full foliage.
It changes our sunsets and the city lights. The trees covered up everything in our line of sight. Now, when I look out, I can see the lights from the neighborhoods through the trees that are still standing. I have a hard time seeing the beauty in it. I’m sure with time I’ll come to love it and see the beauty, but just not today. Not tomorrow either.
The noise is horrible. The equipment runs from 8 a.m. until sunset six days a week. Not five. SIX. With the longer days, that means it’s about twelve hours of hearing this equipment except for their mandatory break periods. I’m at home all day without a car. I have no escape until it warms up and I can get out to take walks. I thought maybe it would be like living next to train tracks in which the noise became ambient. After a month, I’m still waiting. Also, the lack of trees opened up more noise from the businesses in the area. Not only is the construction equipment running right behind us, but any equipment from the industrial businesses back there can be heard.
We don’t know what’s going back there. It is an industrial/business area on the other side so it could be building for a new or existing business. My hope is it’s clearing area for the day care that is over there. I’m okay with more space for kids.
But who knows because when I came home yesterday, this happened…
The ONE line of trees we had when they first started is gone. Razed while I was out yesterday morning.
This change is excruciating.